The Perfect Loving Family
by ConcreteAngelRoxHerHalo
Summary: AU. Marius Pontmercy married Cosette; Now they have a beautiful daughter who strives for her parents' attention. He raised the Thernardier siblings as his own children and he visits the Musain on the weekend. Everything is perfect, until... Until... "They're not here". Crack fic written as a FINALS ARE FINALLY DONE present. I don't own n2n, otherwise it would still be on Broadway.
1. Chapter 1

Marius was half asleep at the kitchen table, his thumbs in a war with each other. His bleary eyes stole a glance at the clock that hung above the microwave. Three in the morning. Where the hell were they?

As if called by his thoughts alone, he heard the slight whisper of the front door opening, accompanied by the muffled sounds of adolescent giggling. He stood as the siblings entered the room, shooting a nervous glance at each other when they saw his frustration.

"What's this?" Éponine asked. "You haven't waited up for us in months."

"I was counting the ways you could have been killed." Marius snapped. He made a promise to his late father to help the Thernardier family in any way that he could, so treating the siblings like his own children was the best way he could think to do it. He wished that he could take in Azelma. She used to visit, but eventually she stopped. She never mentioned why. Once Marius called her and asked her why she never came to visit Gavroche or Éponine. She hung up on him.

"And tonight's top three are…?" Gavroche responded, cheekily. Éponine ruffled her brother's hair with a proud smile. She'd taught him well.

"A freak September ice-storm with no warning," Marius began. The brother and sister dynamic duo groaned. Marius had a habit of exaggerating everything.

"Because _that_ happens." Éponine said with a hint of disdain. Marius glared at her, causing the girl to falter (she would never admit it, but her crush on Marius hadn't completely died. It just simmered into embers that burned only slightly in the pit of her stomach).

"The avian flu." He added, causing Gavroche to snort.

Marius shot _him_ a look as well, but Gavroche shook it off with a snippy, "We're not birds, are we?"

"The French Revolution." He concluded.

"You've got to stop watching the history channel." Éponine smiled sweetly at him to let him know that she was joking. She pushed into the kitchen, heading towards the fridge that was decorated with pictures of Marius, Cosette, and their daughter Noelie. Éponine and Gavroche tended to avoid pictures for reasons that Marius couldn't fathom.

"Now you're being all sweet, but you swore that you'd bring him home early." Marius stood up, his bones creaking from the effort. When had he grown so old? Whereas Gavroche and Éponine seemed to perpetually be children, he just seemed to fade more and more with each passing year.

"You've got to chill the fuck down, mister. We're street kids, no one can hold us down." Éponine said, holding a small apple in her calloused palm.

"Language!" Marius gasped, causing Éponine to chuckle. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed the thirty-something man on the cheek.

"Marius? Sweetie?" Cosette's bell-like tone rang through the house from upstairs.

"It's Cosette; go up the back way." He told the children, gently ushering them out of the kitchen. Gavroche stuck behind though, looking up at Marius with a confused look on his young face.

"Why does she hate us?" He asked, and Marius offered him a shrug.

"She doesn't hate you. But you can admit that you guys are a pain in the ass." He grinned at the boy and grabbed a dishtowel, using it to playfully swat the pre-teen out the door.

"Marius?" Cosette asked from the doorway. She was the waiting wife, her blond hair slightly mussed and her hooded blue eyes rimmed with red. She pulled her robe closer to her. "What's going on? I heard voices."

"Oh, it's just me, talking to myself." He chuckled and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She leaned into his touch, sighing against his chest.

"Will you come to bed soon?" She murmured.

Marius, being Marius, had to ask for confirmation for what he thought she was hinting at. "For sex?"

She looked up at him, having to crane her neck to look at him. Once they made eye-contact, she rolled her eye pointedly. "You don't know how to be subtle, do you?"

He laughed, a full sound that echoed through their comfortable kitchen. "It's never been my strong suit."

His laughter was contagious, and she soon joined in. However, once their peals of joy subsided, she frowned and a familiar crease appeared between her perfectly-shaped eyebrows. "Are you sure everything's okay?"

He peeled himself away from her and shot her a comforting smile. "Just as okay as it always is!"

Her frown deepened at this, but she nodded. "Are you sure you'll be up soon?"

"I promise."

* * *

Noelie Éponine Pontmercy did her absolute best in everything. She was taking mostly senior classes, even though she was a sophomore, and she played the cello as if someone would destroy every single stringed instrument the next day. Every night found her up past two in the morning, desperately trying to finish the last of her homework.

_Marius remembered his daughter's birth very clearly. She'd emerged perfectly healthy, albeit bloody and wailing, but healthy. As soon as she was cleaned and swaddled, she was placed in Cosette's arms. Marius leaned over his wife and looked at their baby girl. Cosette said, as if a question, "Can we name her Noelie?"_

_Marius responded with, "Middle name Éponine?" _

_Cosette's face softened, and she nodded, her blue eyes shining with unshed tears. Marius looked up and saw Éponine sitting in the chair in the corner. A beaming smile unlike any other graced her face, bringing out what beauty she could have had if her life had been better. Marius nodded at her, finding himself choked up at the beauty of life. _

_However, as Noelie grew up, Marius's caretaking of the Thernardier siblings sometimes took the place of his paternal duties. Because of this, his poor daughter grew up feeling forgotten and unloved by her father and also by her mother, who was busy trying to help her father with his depression. She knew that she was being selfish, but she couldn't help the way she felt. _

Noelie, testing her can of Red Bull, found it was empty. She sighed and stood from her place on the couch. She went into the kitchen to get another can, only to see her father sitting at the kitchen table rubbing his temples. He looked at her strangely.

"Noelie, honey, it's three in the morning. Is everything okay?" He asked, seeming concerned. She shook her head, her frizzy hair curling as it dried from the shower she'd taken after dinner.

"Everything's great!" She said, sarcastically. "Why wouldn't it be great? It's great. I've just got-" She proceeded to list every single one of her incomplete homework assignments. She finished with, "It's just so… Under control." Noelie threw back her head, trying to drain the dregs of her energy drink.

In a rare show of affection, Marius stepped forwards and put a hand on his daughter's shoulder. "You need to slow down; take some time for yourself." He shrugged off his robe, leaving it where it landed on the floor. He turned to leave, calling back at his daughter, "I'm going to have _sex_ with your mother."

"Great," She groaned. "Thanks. I'm _so_ glad I know that."

* * *

The next morning was an insane hustle as the Pontmercy family prepared for a Monday. Marius, who practiced law from home, walked around in sweat pants and a v-neck, making terrible sandwiches. He made four, one for each member of his odd little family. Cosette tossed hers into her purse, and Noelie grumbled before putting hers into her backpack. Éponine and Gavroche ignored the sandwiches. On many occasions, Gavroche had reminded him of his extremely bad culinary abilities.

Marius tossed the two forgotten sandwiches into the trash bin and turned to his wife and daughter. Éponine and Gavroche had already left to do God-knows-what. He kissed his daughter's forehead and sent her out the door and to the bus. Cosette took the coffee that Marius made her and smiled as she gathered her things for the day.

"Marius, what are you going to do today?" She asked, expecting him to reply with something naively honest, like 'I'm going to watch Gossip Girl reruns'.

He shrugged. "I might visit Courfeyrac or Bousset. I haven't hung out with the guys in a while."

Cosette froze. She looked to her husband, a pained expression on her beautiful face. "You're going to run by St. Michael's Church?"

He was confused, but he answered. "Sure. Why?"

She sighed. "Marius, maybe it's time that we visit Doctor Fine."

* * *

Seven weeks later, Marius's new pills had been working extraordinarily well. Cosette was ecstatic, and while Joly reprimanded him for taking so many, Cosette's happiness was worth any price to him. He went to the bar shortly after his seven-week adjustment. When he was about to order a drink, Combeferre advised him not to. He couldn't know what the combination of alcohol and the pills would do.

His wise acquaintance was right, as always. He ordered a cup of water and sat at the large booth tucked away in a hidden niche at the Corinth. Enjolras poured over his notes while Grantaire, Joly and Bahorel discussed their sex lives. Some of the things they said made Marius, a married man, blush.

But it was time with his friends, and he managed to catch a glimpse of the shadow-like Éponine on her way home. He stopped the car and told her to get in. She obeyed him, as always.

They drove the route to Marius's home and when he asked about Gavroche, she said something about him visiting the Elephant. The Elephant was a statue in the local park that (Gavroche discovered) was hollow. It was his first real home, the Thernardier parents being unable to offer that to their eldest son.

Marius and Éponine pulled into the drive just in time to see a nervous, gangly boy kiss his Noelie before running off. He saw his daughter put her fingers on her lips, a smile gracing her usually tense face. He exhaled, trying to process the scene in front of him.

"Spying on your own daughter?" Éponine spoke up from beside him.

"When did she get a boyfriend? How did I miss this?" He asked his old neighbor, looking towards her. She shrugged, and made a move to exit the car.

"You kinda miss a lot." A sadness flashed in her eyes that made Marius suddenly feel very guilty, but he turned his attention back to his daughter as she entered the house.

"Do you think they're in love?" He asked. Éponine paused outside the car.

"Who knows? They're young. They're horny."

* * *

"Come on, Marmar. You can't possibly think that this is _healthy_, can you?" Gavroche asked, rummaging through Marius's many pills.

"I told you not to call me that." Marius said, his oblong white pills in hand. Suddenly, he had an overwhelming desire to throw away his pills. They turned his bright world into a faded reality that bored him to no end. Even his friends seemed to fade, as though they were stains on the shirt of his life. He wanted to keep the shirt dirty.

Gavroche perched on the bathroom counter, an impish grin spreading across his face. "Do it."

Marius, surprised, looked up. "Do what?"

"Throw them away. They're bullshit." Gavroche said. Marius frowned.

"Language!"

However, the boy had a point. Marius eagerly pulled a majority of his bottles out and dumped them into the toilet. After a couple of flushes, the colorful medicine that darkened his world disappeared, leaving him far more satisfied than any other treatment.

"I'm proud of you." Gavroche said. Marius looked up at the kid who was taller than him with the way they were situated, Marius on the floor and Gavroche on the counter.

"What will Cosette think?" Marius suddenly felt horribly vulnerable. Gavroche hopped down and patted the man's back.

"She doesn't have to know." He winked, and dashed out of the bathroom.

**A/N: This is the result of finals week (along with three C's, two A's, and one B. And a stress migraine.)**

**I think someone slipped something into my Dr. Pepper, because this is a serious crack fic.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I don't own Les Mis or next to normal. If I did own either, Aaron Tveit would be my masseuse, Adam Chanler-Berat would be my butler, Daniel Huttlestone would be engaged to my little sister and Jen Damiano would be my (paid) best friend. This is why nobody should give me any power.**

* * *

It was gonna be good. Cosette was sure of it. Marius' medication had been working famously and he hadn't shown a single symptom for a month. She sighed happily and sat back at the reception desk. For once, she was looking forward to going home.

_Home_. She thought. She liked the sound of that word and the promises that it made.

* * *

"Will you guys come over for dinner tonight?" Marius asked. The guys made mumbling refusals, except for Enjolras, who outwardly groaned. "Come on, it's Gavroche's birthday!"

"Fine."

* * *

"Noelie! And this must be Hayden!" Cosette exclaimed, kissing her daughter's wild curls. Noelie, uncomfortable, squirmed out of her mother's grasp and stood next to her boyfriend.

"Actually, it's Heath." He corrected, politely. A bag of a mysterious substance emerged from his back pocket, and Noelie discreetly pushed it further down.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you!" She said, warmly, grasping the boy's hand. "Why don't you join us for dinner?"

"Um, Mom, Heath can't really stay… He's got, um…" Noelie began, trying to find a valid excuse to save herself from massive embarrassment. She patted the tall boy's upper arm as Cosette shook her head.

"It's gonna be good!" Cosette repeated her previously mentioned thought, and Noelie's eyes widened at her mother's optimism. Whenever she was _this _happy, it meant that she was hiding her fears behind a smile.

"Homework!" Noelie finally said, but Heath looked towards her mother and then back at her, a question in his warm, brown eyes.

"It's gonna be _great_."

"Surgery!" She cried, but he was already being whisked inside by her mother. As a last attempt, she yelled, "Rabies!"

"Oh, honey, don't be such a bother." Cosette giggled. "We'll just have dinner, some small talk, we'll sit right down together like a happy family should. It's going to be okay!"

Heath nodded in agreement as Cosette led him to their large dining room. Marius waved at his daughter as he set the table. Les Amis were all there, occupying the untaken seats on the lower half of the table. They were loud and rowdy, and Marius wanted everyone to be quiet for the moment when he surprised little Gavroche, who was sitting in Courfeyrac's lap.

"Would you be quiet?" Marius announced. Cosette gave him a wary look, Heath seemed extraordinarily confused, and Noelie hit her head on the table repeatedly.

Les Amis quieted down then, looking at Marius expectedly. He dashed into the kitchen and emerged with a large chocolate cake (Gavroche's favorite) that was smeared in pale blue icing. In Marius' messy icing job, it said 'Happy Birthday, 'Vroche!"

"It's someone's birthday!" Marius exclaimed, and Cosette stood immediately, tears running down the face that had, moments before, been smiling and laughing.

"Whose birthday is it?" Heath asked, innocently. Noelie, her eyes burning with a hatred that was expressed at everyone and everything, glared at Heath. He sank into his chair, guilty that he'd asked anything.

"I don't know. Dad?" She said, her voice sickly sweet.

Cosette's blue eyes sent daggers to her daughter. "Don't provoke your father, Noelle."

"God damn it, Mom, my name is _Noelie!_" She screamed, her eyes watery. "This is fucked."

"Language!" Cosette scolded, realizing the stupidity of it too late, for Noelie slammed her hands on the table and stood.

"FUCK THIS." She made a hasty exit, quickly followed by Heath. Right before he left the room, he turned towards the Pontmercys, confusion still the prominent emotion in his eyes.

"It was lovely to meet you both." He said, leaving. Cosette sat back down, burying her head in her hands. Éponine stood by Cosette and ran a soothing hand up the older woman's back. Gavroche was about to cry, knowing that something was terribly wrong on his birthday. Courfeyrac held him close, whispering half-hearted assurances in his ear.

"What's wrong, _petit alouette_?" Éponine asked, softly. Cosette said nothing, instead shaking with sobs.

"Cosette, Éponine asked you a question." Marius frowned at his sweet wife's rudeness.

She looked up at him, her make-up running down her face. Her bell-like voice broke as she said, "They're not here, Marius."

"What do you mean?" He asked, panic coursing through his veins. Cosette motioned with her hand and he came closer, still balancing the cake in his hands.

"They've been dead for sixteen years, Marius." She said, and he looked around the room, bewildered.

It was Enjolras who finally spoke, his annoyed tone tinged with sympathy. "Pontmercy, you have always been annoyingly ignorant."

"It's true." Grantaire said next, taking a swig of his flask. It was a rare occurrence; the cynic agreed with the believer.

"Don't you remember the protest on June 5th?" Bossuet asked. Marius shook his head, lost.

"Mister Marius, don't listen to them." Éponine's sultry voice rose above the others. "We're right here. Aren't we?" She seemed to doubt her own words, and she sank into the chair beside Cosette.

"Cosette…" Marius' voice was wobbly, and his wife stood and gently pried the cake out of his hands. "What's going on?"

"They died, sixteen years ago." Cosette repeated, as if she was speaking with a small child. "There was a protest-"

"Stop." Marius begged.

"The police came before they could get away-"

"Cosette, please!"

"They opened fire-"

"STOP IT." Marius yelled, sweeping his hand over the table. A plate, caught in his motion, went flying across the room and shattered on the wall. Cosette backed away in alarm. "I said," Marius panted. "_Please_."

"What about your medication?" She tried a different approach. Marius shot her an apologetic glance.

"We now have the happiest septic tank on the block!" He offered. Cosette groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"Jesus, Mar, they were working."

"Mar?" Bahorel snickered. Grantaire elbowed his friend in the gut.

"They weren't," Marius said, looking down at his shaking hands. "Not really."

"That's okay…" Cosette did her best to look on the bright side. "We can go back to the doctor and-"

"NO!" Marius yelled, this time pushing the cake off the table. The treat landed on the ground in a pile of mushy, blue-brown goop. (Marius had never been the best cook)

"Marius, please, stop it! This isn't helping. I know-"

"You know?" Marius laughed sarcastically. Cosette was even more alarmed. She'd seen several crazy sides to her husband, but never this. "_Ma Cherie_, pray tell, what exactly do you know?"

She gulped down her fear and answered him. "I know that you're hurting. I am too!"

"Do you wake up in the morning and need help to lift your head?" Marius asked.

"No, but-"

"Do you read obituaries and feel jealous of the dead?"

Jehan groaned from his place next to Courfeyrac. "Why are you rhyming, Marius? This is hardly the time to do so, and that's coming from _me_!"

Marius ignored the poet. "It's like… Living on a Cliffside, not knowing when you'll dive…" He continued, pressing his hand to his forehead. Cosette bravely took a step towards him.

"I know, honey, I know…" It was the wrong thing to say. Marius leapt away, glaring.

"Do you know what it's like to die alive?"

"No-"

"See, you _don't _ know." He said, triumphantly.

"Okay, I don't know." She gave up. "But can you tell me what it is you're afraid of?" She paused, a tear rolling down her swollen face. "Why am I afraid it's me?"

"It's not that, Cosette. Just don't try to understand this. Don't try to understand _me_." He said.

"But that's just it, isn't it?" She asked. "I'm the one who will always _try_."

"Mister, hate to interrupt, but _I do understand_." Éponine broke in, walking over to Marius and laying a hand on his shoulder. "You're waiting for an answer. You're wishing for a break. She wants all that you can't give."

"Are you bleeding? Are you bruised and broken inside?" Cosette asked, placing her delicate hand on Marius' chest. He avoided her gaze.

"You're hurting constantly," Éponine continued, strength being added to her voice. "But at the same time, you feel like you're healing. You're hoping for a life to live that's finally yours."

"_Marius,_" Cosette breathed, and she and Éponine said at the same time, "So am I."

"Mister, look at me." Éponine said.

"Tell me what to do!" Cosette begged. "Tell me who to be!"

"She's lying to you!" Éponine finally cried out. "Just _look_. We're all here!"

"I will always be here, I will always try. I'm the one who'll stay. I'll do my best to heal you, Marius. We want you to get better, Noelie and I." She took his hand and pressed it to her heart. "My heart beats for _you_. I won't walk away. So if you dare try to tell me that I don't give a damn-"

"You _don't _give a damn!" Éponine snapped. Marius turned towards the brunette.

"Don't talk to her that way."

Éponine backed away, hurt. Cosette gently guided his chin so that he was looking her in the eyes. "I am the one who loves you. I'm holding on…"

"You say that you hurt like me…" He said, meeting Cosette's eyes. Maybe she was telling thr truth after all. She nodded and took his hand in hers, pressing their entwined digits to her lips.

"I won't let go," Éponine decided to rejoin, whispering her part in Marius' ear as she trailed her hand down his other arm, linking her fingers with his.

"You should know," The girls said at the same time. Marius looked over at Éponine, and he could see the concealed pain in her brown eyes. _She_ understood. As much as he adored Cosette, it was his old friend Éponine that understood him. He jerked away from Cosette.

"Oh," She murmured, sadly, knowing that she'd lost him.

"You say that you understand, but you don't know…" Marius stood and walked over to where Les Amis were sitting.

"_You _don't know who I am if you think I'll give up this easily," Cosette said, looking around her dining room that was empty but for Marius and his delusions.

"You don't know." He repeated. Éponine took the tall man in her adolescent arms and rubbed comforting circles on his back.

"You just don't know who I am, Cosette. If you did, maybe you'd understand…" The brunette said softly, glaring at the woman who couldn't see her.

* * *

**A/N: I WAS GOING TO FINISH IT IN THIS CHAPTER BUT THEN THE PLOT BUNNY DIED BECAUSE I DIDN'T FEED IT IN TIME. **

**I have a stick in my ear. **

**Review!**


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